Ways to dry my hands, in order of preference

  1. Holiday hand towels (preferably after using scented soap)
  2. hand towels, nondenominational
  3. paper towels, recycled
  4. paper towels
  5. brown paper towels that smell when they’re wet and don’t really absorb anything
  6. on my jeans
  7. hand dryers (see #6)
  8. those tri-folded towels that you need like 4 of and you have to reach up to get while water goes down your arm